The UK Establishment

The Royal Family

A buzz around the French contingent at the pizza evening this week was the gender and birth date of Kate Middleton's forthcoming baby. I was quizzed but had to confess total ignorance. I haven't been following this new item and, frankly, neither know nor care about it (whilst understanding that it must be very important for the couple concerned). The same clearly can't be said of the French and there is an equally clear assumption on their part that the English should know more than they do. I don't.

Maybe I'm not typically English in this respect but the point reinforces an early perception that the French were more interested in the English royal family than the English. I remember, on only my second visit to France, being quizzed by me friend Claude's family on why an English newspaper was in trouble for reporting that that the current queen was pregnant. I tried (in vain) to explain that protocol at the time dictated that the correct phrasing was that the queen was going to have a baby, not that she was pregnant. They protested; perfectly logically, that if she was going to have a baby then she must be pregnant. I could only agree but.............Anyway, what struck me most was that this working class French family was apparently fascinated by the English royal family; why? And they expected me to know more than they did. Once again, phraseology apart, I didn't.

HMRC

The dear old UK revenue “service” has reared it's head again and I can't work out whether to laugh or cry (hysterically in both cases).

Five years ago I entered the French tax system and attempted to extricate myself from the UK one, via an apparently simple P85 form. It took three years of intricate communications actually to do so. I thought I was finally shot of their shambles. However, my mother's death put the two of us in contact again, since they needed to know details of her estate and to establish her tax position. That I understood.

My mother died three months into the tax year and, given her income, there could never be any question of a tax underpayment, only possibly a very small rebate which I explicitly renounced and said should be given to a charity of HMRC's choice. She had a small pension from NAAFI for which one overpayment had been made and which I immediately reimbursed, with ackowledgement from NAAFI that the matter was closed.. I subsequently received from HMRC a letter stating that I had to inform NAAFI of my mother's death since they were unaware of it and her pension was still being paid; they couldn't close my mother's situation until that was resolved. The letter quoted my mother's NI number as a reference. So, I sent HMRC the documentation from NAAFI. They duly replied saying they couldn't process this as they needed my mother's NI number. I am about to reply with a copy of their own letter quoting the NI number and an assurance to the person dealing with this that, if they ever forget their name, they can rest assured that I can supply the information as I have it on file.  I shall also suggest that any overpayment be donated specifically to Mencap.

I remember, some 30 years ago, my ex-wife being enamoured of Shire Hite at the peak of her feminist fame at the same time that several American universities, in their statistics courses, were using her as a prime example of the abuse of statistics. If ever any universities want an exemplar of extreme administrative incompetence in a developed country, they probably could do no better than study HMRC.

Gardening

The clement weather has enabled me to get to grips with gardening. The plants I expected to come through our very average winter have largely done so, with the jury still out on one of the three solanums which I covered with protective material; I've watered it and will just wait to see. I was very pleased that some of the snowdrops that I took from my mother's garden after she died have flowered; they should be moved only “in the green” (while the leave are still showing) and had got past that stage when I took them. It will be another thing by which to remember her.

There's still some clearing up to be done but a lot to anticipate. I've planted several new roses and am keen to see how they progress. I've also bought several dahlias which I shall start off at the end of the month to provide colour at the back from mid-summer onwards, plus a couple of lavenders which are already planted. Everywhere is manured so it is more or less “all system go”.